By Radish Loos, MA, CCC, Drama Therapist, Counsellor & Play Therapy Practitioner

Behaviour is communication, and play is children’s natural language. 

If you are noticing that your child is having new or increased emotional outbursts, difficulties sleeping, challenges with peers or siblings, struggling with transitions, withdrawing, or behaving in ways that leave you feeling concerned or perplexed, play therapy may be a helpful way to support your child.

A big transition: a move, a new family member, a separation, a loss, or even the transition into a new school year and new routines can be enough to cause a child significant distress. Sometimes a child is experiencing emotional distress and you have no idea why, but you notice because their behaviours have changed. A child often does not have the words to explain what’s happening in their inner world. Having a safe, supportive space to navigate these difficult experiences and make sense of their feelings with a trained professional who understands their language can make all the difference!

Play isn’t simply something children do for fun, it is an important part of healthy development. Through play, children have opportunities to explore their environment, practice relationships, process experiences, develop problem-solving skills, and experiment with different ways of being. For children who have experienced significant stress, trauma, or disruptions in development, therapeutic play can provide opportunities to safely revisit experiences and develop new ways of responding.

What is Play Therapy?

Play therapy is a therapeutic modality in which play serves as the primary medium for communication and therapeutic exploration. There are many different models of play therapy, with both directive and non-directive approaches. There are additional related approaches, such as Theraplay and Filial Therapy, that use play in different ways and have their own unique theoretical foundations and training.

A play therapist uses their knowledge of child development, therapeutic theory, and specific play therapy principles to create a therapeutic environment where the child can communicate and work through experiences through play. Garry Landreth, a counsellor, author, professor, and founder of the Center for Play Therapy at the University of North Texas, famously described play as a child’s natural language and toys as a child’s words (Landreth, 2002).

Why Play Therapy Works

Play gives children opportunities to experiment with different possibilities in ways that can feel safer and more accessible than talking directly about difficult experiences. Through imaginative play, storytelling, role-play, creative expression, repetition, movement and embodiment, children can explore emotions, relationships, problem-solving, and different ways of responding. They can try something, see what happens, and try again. This process of exploration and experimentation can support psychological flexibility and a growing sense of competence and agency.

In Child-Centred Play Therapy (CCPT), the therapist follows the child’s lead and allows the child to determine the direction of the play. Rather than directing the child toward a particular activity or outcome, the therapist creates a safe and accepting environment where the child can explore their feelings, experiences, and relationships through play. It isn’t the toys themselves that make the therapy therapeutic. The relationship with a therapist who is consistently accepting, attuned, and responsive is central to the therapeutic process, providing the safety and support needed for therapeutic exploration. Play provides the medium through which that relationship develops.

Following the child’s lead does not mean that there are no boundaries. Limit-setting is an important part of CCPT. The therapist establishes clear, consistent limits when needed to maintain safety, protect the therapeutic space, and help the child learn that their feelings and needs are welcome even when certain behaviours are not.

One approach to limit-setting that is used in CCPT is the ACT model: Acknowledge the feeling, Communicate the limit, and Target an alternative. Rather than simply telling a child what they cannot do, the therapist first recognizes and validates the feeling or intention behind the behaviour. They then clearly and calmly communicate the boundary before offering the child an acceptable alternative. 

Within these boundaries, the child is given meaningful freedom to explore. The therapist may reflect the child’s feelings, words, actions, and play themes which helps the child develop greater awareness of their internal experiences. Over time, this combination of acceptance, autonomy, and appropriate limits can support children in developing emotional awareness, self-regulation, confidence, communication skills, and a stronger sense of agency.

What Parents Can Expect from Play Therapy

Many play therapists will begin with a parent consultation or session without the child present to review the parent’s concerns and learn about important family history and context. Some play therapists may invite the parent to stay in the room during the first play therapy session, while others may suggest that the parent stays only until the child feels comfortable being alone with the therapist.

While a play therapy session may look like a child is simply playing, the therapist is intentionally observing, responding, reflecting, maintaining boundaries, and building a therapeutic relationship. The play itself is the medium through which the therapeutic work takes place. Some parents may begin to notice changes in their child’s behaviour or emotional expression within the first several sessions. However, meaningful therapeutic change can take longer and varies depending on the child, their circumstances, and their treatment goals.

There may be opportunities for parents to observe or engage in play therapy sessions, but this will depend on the individual therapist, the child, and their needs and treatment goals. Not all play therapists structure sessions and parental engagement in the same way, so it is always a good idea to ask your potential therapist clarifying questions about their framework and policies. Many play therapists will schedule progress calls with parents after a certain number of sessions.

It’s important to keep in mind that progress can look different for every child. You may notice changes in how your child communicates their needs, expresses emotions, handles transitions, plays, relates to others, or recovers from difficult moments. Sometimes the first signs of progress are subtle and may appear in the therapy room before they become noticeable at home or at school.

Children deserve a sense of privacy in their therapeutic relationship, just as adults do. What is shared with parents will depend on the child’s age, developmental stage, the therapeutic approach, and the circumstances of treatment. Play therapists may share general themes, progress, recommendations, and ways parents can support their child without sharing every detail of what happens in the playroom. As with other forms of therapy, confidentiality has limits when there are concerns about a child’s safety or the safety of others.

Is Play Therapy Right for Your Child?

Play therapy can support children ages 3 and up and can be helpful for a wide variety of  behaviours and concerns. If you are noticing changes in your child’s behaviour, emotions, relationships, or ability to navigate everyday experiences, you don’t need to know exactly what’s wrong before reaching out for support. A therapist with training in play therapy can help you better understand what your child may be communicating and determine whether a play therapy approach is an appropriate fit for their needs.

Montreal Therapy Centre’s clinicians offer a range of approaches to support children and families. MTC’s current team includes several mental health professionals with training in play therapy and other child-focused approaches. The administrative team will be happy to help connect you with a clinician who can support your child’s unique needs and goals.

Reference

Landreth, G. L. (2002). Play therapy: The art of the relationship (2nd ed.). Brunner-Routledge.

Radish Loos, MA, CCC

Drama Therapist, Counsellor, & Play Therapy Practitioner

Radish Loos (They/Them) is a Creative Arts Therapist and Canadian Certified Counsellor who holds a graduate degree in Drama Therapy and a graduate certificate in Play Therapy from Concordia University. They completed their internship and began their therapy career here at Montreal Therapy Centre, and have since moved to the maritimes. If you are curious about their work or future offerings you can follow them on social media @therapywithRadish.